The doctor, after an examination, sighed and said, 'I've got some bad
news. You have cancer, and you'd best put your affairs in order..'
The woman was shocked, but managed to compose herself and walk into
the waiting room where her daughter had been waiting.
'Well, daughter, we women celebrate when things are good, and we
celebrate when things don't go so well. In this case, things aren't
well. I have cancer. So, let's head to the club and have a martini.'
After 3 or 4 martinis, the two were feeling a little less somber.
There were some laughs and more martinis. They were eventually
approached by some of the woman's old friends, who were curious as to
what the two were celebrating.
The woman told her friends they were drinking to her impending end,
'I've been diagnosed with AIDS.' The friends were aghast, gave the
woman their condolences and beat a hasty retreat.
After the friends left, the woman's daughter leaned over and
whispered, 'Momma, I thought you said you were dying of cancer, and
you just told your friends you were dying of AIDS! Why did you do
'Because I don't want any of those bitches sleeping with your
father after I'm gone.'
And THAT, my friends, is what is called, 'Putting Your Affairs In Order.'
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Happy Mother's Day, and It's Off to the Hospital - Among their many, many chores, it seems that mothers are destined to take their kids to an emergency room at least once. My mother certainly did. In her ow...
4 years ago