I don't forward emails

I will, however, copy and paste some of what I consider the more entertaining ones here. There are two reasons for this:
1 - I don't believe that forwarding serves any useful purpose when there are other forums available
2 - Original thoughts are not my forte... I seem to have quit having them when I quit drinking
That said, this arrived in my Inbox sometime last week:

I was never a fan of Dr. Oz before, but this may change my mind!! :0)

CALMNESS IN OUR LIVES
I am passing this on to you because it definitely works and we could all
use a little more calmness in our lives. By following simple advice heard on
the Oprah show, you too can find inner peace. Dr. Oz proclaimed, 'The way to
achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started and have
never finished.'
So, I looked around my house to see all the things I started and hadn't
finished, and before leaving the house this morning, I finished off a bottle
of Merlot, a bottle of Tequila, a package of Oreos, the remainder of my old
Prozac prescription, the rest of the cheesecake, some Doritos, and a box of
chocolates.
You have no idea how freaking good I feel right now...