Since I felt as though I was shortchanged in the state joke department, I decided to at least attempt to continue with some humor... albeit close to being over the line
You will understand when you reach the end of the story
Toward the end of the Sunday service, the Minister asked, "How many of you have
forgiven your enemies?" .............80% held up their hands.
The Minister then repeated his question.
All responded this time, except one man..................
An avid golfer named Walter Barnes, who attended church only when
the weather was bad.
"Mr. Barnes, it's obviously not a good morning for golf.
It's good to see you here today.
Are you not willing to forgive your enemies?"
"I don't have any," he replied gruffly.
"Mr. Barnes, that is very unusual. How old are you?"
"Ninety-eight," he replied.
The congregation stood up and clapped their hands.
Mr. Barnes, would you please come down in front & tell
us all how a person can live ninety-eight years & not
have an enemy in the world?"
The old golfer tottered down the aisle, stopped in front
of the pulpit, turned around, faced the congregation,
and said simply........
"I outlived all them m*** f***ers."